Who is Mandy?

Who I Am

I'm sure all of you have an idea in you're head of who you think this Mandy Browner person is. I figure it is time to open up and be totelly honest hear.

1. I am a True Christian. I stress this fact a lot, because I really am, I have the Holey Spirit and He reveels the Whole Truth threw my lovely, leather-bound, 1611 KJV Bible. You can trust everything I tell you to be the whole, compleat, truthe.

2. I never write about negetive things becuase I'm just not a negetive person! I'm ALWAYS vary happy, and full of loveliness and joy. Becauze of this, my face radiates happyness all the time, and it's not really something I can help! My secret is that I'm a True Christian - not pagen or athiest, or God forbid, Catholock. Nothing can get me down, nothing, absolutely nothing! People are always asking me, "Mandy, why are you always smiling?" I can feel my adorable smile broaden as I explain to them that it's my True Christianety shining threw, with the help of the Holey Spirut of coarse. Then I whip out a Jack Chick tract and one of my handy, dandy purse-size KJV Bibles (which has my buzienuss card with my name and blog address taped inside), give this to them as a free gift, and tell them they too can become just like me. The way thay gaze back at me with admiration and speechlessness just fills my heart with more joy. I just love being a witness for Christ every day, don't you?

3. Yes, I am "dresses only." And oh yes it's true, I have a vary curvy, sexy body. When one works out for 6 hours every day, and that's just what happans! ;-) (We must, we must...) Of coarse, the Holey Spirat has reveeled to me that I don't have to hide my sexy curves, therefore it's ok for me to ware beautiful dresses that show off my tite ass and perky brests. As long as I'm not waring pants, which are a man's artecal of clothing, then it's ok. And as long as the dress is 2.28 inches below my knees, and I am not showing more than 1.77 inches of cleavege, the Holey Spirut is cool with it.

4. I exercise in the nude. Yes, you read that right - but it's in MY HOME, so what's the problem? I lock my older kids up in their room with a list of chores to keap them buzy, and put Baby Girl in the playpen wear she can't see me, so WHAT'S THE BIG DEAL? I don't know why everybody is always critisizing me for this. :-? Besides, it's much more ecanomical, I don't have to buy exersize clothes, and there's no extra laundry. In fact, Christien women who exercise in speshal clothes really should question rather they are spending their hardworking hubby's money vary wiesley. :=?


5. I don't believe that you have to be "dresses only" to be saved - the only thing that can keap you out of the Kingdom of Heavan is being Catholock. Or, not beleaving in a 6-day creation. Or, working outside the home. Or, listening to rock music (unless it's Tom Petty). Or not submitting to everything you're husband tells you to do (unless he is Catholock). Oh, and not reading the KJV Bible at least 3 hours a day. B ut, if you do these things, than you of coarse would have the Holey Spirat and hence be dresses only. ;-)

6. I believe the KJV is the only inerrant Word of God. Non-English speeking people might be doomed, but I've been praying vary hard that their not.

7. I LOVE to exercise, and that's why I'm so hot! :-)

8. I don't wear makeup because I'm so naterally beautifull, and I look exactly like Angelina Jolie when she's waring makeup. However, I have nothing against people who believe they need to wear makeup, and there are plenty out there who really nead it. Not many are blessed with nateral beauty, and if you nead to enhance what you've got, than please do so for the rest of us who have to look at you. ;-)

9. I do not publish negetive comments that disagree with me because they are incorrect.

10. I am an easygoing person who laughs and jokes and cuts up ALOT. I am really sooooo much fun and cute, if only you could meat me in real life, you would just have the time of you're life. I mean, I really really REALLY am fun and cute!!! I love to joke around, and my husband and my kids just call me adorable all the time, and if I had any real life friends, thay would say the same thing! I'm such a goof! Really! I am full of laughter and energy, really! I really really REALLY want you to beleave this! :-D

11. As much fun as I am, I DO NOT play manipulatien or mind games. If you try to tell me that something I say on MY blog is wrong, we both already know who the liar and manipulater is and its not me, so I will immidietly ban you from my blog! ;-)

12. My house isn't always perfect and neat. Sometimes, I leave a glass in the sink, I may forget to fluff the couch pillows, or Baby Girl may leave her book on the floor. Of coarse, I refuse to let these types of horable messes take over my life, and I get things back to order right away!

Ladies, do you dress like a Woman of the Night?

My dear readers,

How do you dress? Do you dress like a true, Christian lady, or a Woman of the Night?

As KJV only lovely Christian ladies, we are to be holey and set appart, so that when we go to Walmart people will look at us and KNOW that we are KJV only Christians.

Here is how a Woman of the Night dresses:



Notice how cheap and tacky a Woman of the Night looks. She has no cents of style or modasty. Jeans and pants also tend to show those bulges and sadlebags on the thighs. :( Not that I've ever had that problam, but I do see that on women who ware jeans and pants all the time. Its not a pretty site, ladies. :?

A true Christian lady will wear a dress like one of these:



Before I was a Christian, I dressed like a Woman of the Night. But when I became a Christian and read the autherized 1611 King James Bible all the way threw for the first time, God showed me that I had to change my weighs. I didn't realy want two, because I have a vary hot body from working out 6 hours a day and I wanted to show it off. :? T-shirts draw attentian to my purky breasts and jeans draw attentian to my tite ass. I liked the way women looked at me with envy and men staired at me and winked, or smiled, or asked for my phone numbar. (When I was single, I had no problam getting a date. ;) )

But now that I dress like a true Christian lady, I get so much more respect. Men still stair, but it's a look of admaration and not lust. It's sad, because I've had many men confess to me thay wish they're wive's would dress like me. :( Women now look at me with admaration and not envy, and evan aproach me and ask me Bible questions or Christian mothering advise. They can just tell by looking at me that I'm a born-again Christian! (I admit, they also ask me about my excersise reccomendations - I get mistakan for a fittness coach all the time.)

If you are a true Christian woman you would not ware sweatpants and a big T-shirt eather. That is not dressing like a femanine lady, that is being an ugly, slopey frump, and an embaressment to you're sweet hubby. You know that you're soul purpose in life on earth is to please you're hubby. I can personelIy garuentee that he would be daleriosly happy for you to ware any of the lovely dresses above. ;)

Some women say thay can't ware dresses because thay can't work in a dress. But that is just a laizy excuse. If you think it's not possible to do you're work in a dress, hear are some pictures of women working in beautiful dresses:

Vaccuming:


Jogging:


A beautiful, feminane dress can work wanders, hence, I encoarege you to go to Goodwill right now and buy some dresses like the ones above.

Have a blessed day! :)